Myth: My relationship with my partner should be effortless.
Fact: With any two unique individuals coming together, there are going to be differences. Every person and relationship is fundamentally imperfect. One has to work on their relationship every day to make it meaningful and lasting.
By Sakshi Saini (Counseling Psychologist)
I realised over time that not all conversations are meant to be discussed logically, some are purely emotional e.g my partner feeling jealous when i speak with a girl is an emotion and I shouldn't try to explain it logically. This change made things so much easier for me.
When we fight, one of us tries to stay calm and not make it a win-loss ego situation. It doesn't mean don't share your point of view, instead, wait for the nerves to have calmed down.
Pause, breathe, and connect. Your emotions matter so when you are upset about something, take the time to calm down before a discussion with your partner. This helps to identify the core concern, allows for clearer communication and nurtures a loving, respectful dialogue.
Having shared goals and working towards them together has been very helpful in keeping our relationship strong e.g saving for a vacation. Having something to work towards together keeps us motivated and gives us a sense of accomplishment.
Building open, clear and safe channels of communication in your relationship not only removes the stress and distance of guesswork, they also bring in fulfilment, empathy and a real chance of growth. Remember, no matter how well you know your partner, you can't read their mind.