Giving time to yourself and your partner to adjust with each other's habits, patterns and personality is important for a relationship to grow. No magic happens in one month or few weeks; a relationship takes its own time to cultivate.

One thing that has made us very secure in our relationship is truly accepting each other as we are and giving space to each other to be our authentic selves. Obviously, we don't like everything about each other, but accepting these differences without judgment is very important.

Understanding where my hurt or fear or neediness came from was the first step in helping me strengthen our relationship. Getting to know myself better really helped me feel happier in our relationship, including the hopefully passionate, exciting, challenging, and rewarding life-long relationship with myself and my partner.

Before speaking with my partner about what's bothering me, I usually let him know what I hope to get from the conversation. e.g "I just want to be heard", or, "I want your inputs on something and love for us to problem solve together", etc.

My partner would sometimes  react strongly to a situation and it would catch me off guard. Over time we learnt to talk about it once things calmed down and it helped me better understand her triggers and how i can avoid them.