So it’s not gonna be easy. It’s gonna be really hard. We’re gonna have to work at this every day, but I want to do that because I want you. I want all of you, forever, you and me, every day - Notebook
Giving time to yourself and your partner to adjust with each other's habits, patterns and personality is important for a relationship to grow. No magic happens in one month or few weeks; a relationship takes its own time to cultivate.
In love, there's no one-size-fits-all solution, but understanding and addressing the Withdrawer vs. Pursuer dynamic can significantly improve how you navigate a conflict and your relationship. It's a journey of self-awareness and empathy that can lead to a stronger and healthier partnership.
Having shared goals and working towards them together has been very helpful in keeping our relationship strong e.g saving for a vacation. Having something to work towards together keeps us motivated and gives us a sense of accomplishment.
Sorry isn't the end of anything. If you mean it, it's supposed to be the beginning that leads to a change. So, the next time you find yourself apologizing to your partner, take a moment to reflect on how you can turn that sorry into a catalyst for positive changes in your relationship.
My partner would sometimes react strongly to a situation and it would catch me off guard. Over time we learnt to talk about it once things calmed down and it helped me better understand her triggers and how i can avoid them.