Whenever she would do something that I didn't like, I would immediately go to a negative place. Over time I learnt to ask myself - What are other possibilities that may be more positive than what i am thinking? Assume she was trying to help. Asked myself the question - What’s another possibility?
One thing that has made us very secure in our relationship is truly accepting each other as we are and giving space to each other to be our authentic selves. Obviously, we don't like everything about each other, but accepting these differences without judgment is very important.
Having shared goals and working towards them together has been very helpful in keeping our relationship strong e.g saving for a vacation. Having something to work towards together keeps us motivated and gives us a sense of accomplishment.
Ever heard of relationship check-ins? They are a great way for maintaining a healthy relationship. They provide dedicated time and space for couples to express their needs, desires, and concerns, ensuring that both partners are on the same page in their relationship. Also, it's a myth that check-ins have to be difficult.
My partner would sometimes react strongly to a situation and it would catch me off guard. Over time we learnt to talk about it once things calmed down and it helped me better understand her triggers and how i can avoid them.
I unknowingly started expecting my partner to be a reflection of myself, often asking "why can't you also" when pointing out things I do. But I realized that he brings his own strengths to the relationship, and expecting him to mirror me is not fair or healthy.
