As a couple, staying friends has always been important for us, so we have a lot of simple rituals that help us stay that way. E.g together we write inspiring, funny, and uplifting messages on sticky notes and leave them in unexpected places around our community.
When we fight, one of us tries to stay calm and not make it a win-loss ego situation. It doesn't mean don't share your point of view, instead, wait for the nerves to have calmed down.
Before speaking with my partner about what's bothering me, I usually let him know what I hope to get from the conversation. e.g "I just want to be heard", or, "I want your inputs on something and love for us to problem solve together", etc.
Giving time to yourself and your partner to adjust with each other's habits, patterns and personality is important for a relationship to grow. No magic happens in one month or few weeks; a relationship takes its own time to cultivate.
Little gestures go a long way in a relationship. Bear hugs, a good bye kiss before leaving for work, bringing home a small gift, or snack, etc are seemingly small deeds but have a great positive impact on a relationship.
My partner would sometimes react strongly to a situation and it would catch me off guard. Over time we learnt to talk about it once things calmed down and it helped me better understand her triggers and how i can avoid them.
