We tried hobby swapping and found a whole new world of things to do together. Who knew? Turns out I actually liked some of his hobbies! Now we have a whole list of shared interests, and our bond is stronger than ever!

I used to body-shame my partner by saying something negative about her height, looks, etc. But then I realized that I wasn’t having fun with her, but instead at her cost and it started to impact her mental health. I immediately apologized to her and stopped.

I unknowingly started expecting my partner to be a reflection of myself, often asking "why can't you also" when pointing out things I do. But I realized that he brings his own strengths to the relationship, and expecting him to mirror me is not fair or healthy.

Building open, clear and safe channels of communication in your relationship not only removes the stress and distance of guesswork, they also bring in fulfilment, empathy and a real chance of growth. Remember, no matter how well you know your partner, you can't read their mind.

Understanding where my hurt or fear or neediness came from was the first step in helping me strengthen our relationship. Getting to know myself better really helped me feel happier in our relationship, including the hopefully passionate, exciting, challenging, and rewarding life-long relationship with myself and my partner.